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Matthew 12:28-34 - One of the scribes came, and having heard them reasoning together, and perceiving that [Christ] had answered them well, asked him, Which is the first commandment of all? 29 And Jesus answered him, The first of all the commandments is, Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God is one Lord: 30 And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment. 31 And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these. 32 And the scribe said unto him, Well, Master, thou hast said the truth: for there is one God; and there is none other but he: 33 And to love him with all the heart, and with all the understanding, and with all the soul, and with all the strength, and to love his neighbour as himself, is more than all whole burnt offerings and sacrifices. 34 And when Jesus saw that he answered discreetly, he said unto him, Thou art not far from the kingdom of God.

The Four Basic Temperaments:

1. Choleric: The Leader (Fast Forward)

2. Sanguine: The Talker (Play)

3. Phlegmatic: The Shy One (Pause)

4. Melancholy: The Perfectionist (Rewind)

The Seven Motivational Spiritual Gifts – Romans 12:6-8:

1. Prophecy

2. Ministry

3. Teaching

4. Exhortation

5. Giving

6. Ruling

7. Mercy

The Five Love Languages:

1. Giving of Gifts

2. Acts of Service

3. Quality Time

4. Physical Touch

5. Words of Affirmation

The Five Languages of Apology – Matthew 5:21-26; 18:7; Luke 17:1-4; 14:31-32; Mark 11:24-26:

1. Expressing Regret: "I’m Sorry."

2. Accepting Responsibility: "I Was Wrong."

3. Making Restitution: "How Can I Make It Right?"

4. Genuine Repentance: "It’ll Never Happen Again."

5. Requesting Forgiveness: "Please Forgive Me."

Ten Things Forgiveness Is Not:

1. Forgiveness Is Not Approving or Diminishing Sin.

2. Forgiveness Is Not Enabling Sin.

3. Forgiveness Is Not Denying Wrongdoing.

4. Forgiveness Is Not Awaiting An Apology.

5. Forgiveness Is Not Forgetting.

6. Forgiveness Is Not Ceasing to Feel The Pain.

7. Forgiveness Is Not A One-Time Event.

8. Forgiveness Is Not Neglecting Justice.

9. Forgiveness Is Not Trusting.

10. Forgiveness Is Not Reconciliation.

Forgiveness Is Not Natural – It’s SUPERnatural.

Forgiveness Is …

1. Giving Up Your Right to Get Even.

2. Choosing to Stop Feeding the Anger and Resentment Toward the Person Who Hurt You, but Letting Out Your Hurt in a Positive Way.

3. Letting All Judgments Toward the Person Who has Hurt You Be Handled by God.

4. Getting to the Place Where You Can Say to the Person Who Harmed You, “I Wish For You a Blessing on Your Life.”

5. Realizing That the Hurt Perpetrated Against You may Have Been an Unintentional Offense.

6. Realizing That the Hurt Perpetrated Against You May Have Been a Misunderstanding.

7. Realizing That the Hurt Perpetrated Against You May Have Been the Result of a Simple Miscommunication.

8. Realizing That the Hurt Perpetrated Against You may Have Been the Result of Personal Misconceptions, resulting from a Lack of Knowledge About a Person or Situation.

9. "Forgiveness is the mental and/or spiritual process of ceasing to feel resentment, indignation or anger against another person for a perceived offense, difference or mistake, or ceasing to demand punishment or restitution."

Three Powerful Principles of Forgiveness:

1. When You Have truly Forgiven Someone, You Will Spare Your Offender’s Reputation.

2. When You Have truly Forgiven Someone, You Will Give God Room To Work With Your Offender, As He Sees Best Fit.

3. When You Have truly Forgiven Someone, You Will Strive To Willingly Offer Tokens Of Forgiveness And Reconciliation To Your Offender.

Living What You’ve Learned About Relationships – Romans 12:9-21:

¹ Let love be without dissimulation – "Love" = agape, or unconditional, love; "Without dissimulation" = sincere, "undisassembled," unfeigned, unhypocritical – or real – Be consistent, and complete, in your investments into people – "undisassembled."

² Abhor that which is evil – "Abhor" = to detest utterly; "eschew ("eschew" = to turn off, to be completely without) evil" (Job 1:1); "abstain ("abstain" = to hold oneself off, or to refrain) from all appearance ("appearance" = a view, fashion, shape, or sight – if it looks evil, don’t do it)of evil" (1 Thess 5:22); and "whatsoever is not of faith is sin" (Rom 14:23).

³ Cleave to that which is good – "Cleave" = to glue, to stick, or to keep company; and "Good" = good.

10 ⁴ Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love – or, "In brotherly love to one
another, love one another fervently."

⁵ In honour preferring one another – or, "In honor, putting others before you."

11 ⁶ Not slothful in business – or, "In your diligence, not being slothful – "Slothful" = tardy, insolent, or irksome – cf. Prov 25:19 – "Confidence in an unfaithful man in time of trouble is like a broken tooth, and a foot out of joint."

⁷ Fervent in spirit – or, "In spirit burning" – "Fervent" = hot, boiling, glowing (spoken of solids), fervid, earnest … fervent in spirit.

⁸ Serving the Lord – or, "Enslaved to the Lord." – "serving" = to be a slave.

12 ⁹ Rejoicing in hope – "Rejoicing" = being glad and full of joy; "hope" = expectation and confidence" – we ought to rejoice when we hear good news, and especially when we hear that a soul has come to Christ!

¹⁰ Patient in tribulation – or "In trouble enduring [or, being longsuffering]" – "Patient" = to undergo, to bear up under, or to have fortitude; "tribulation" = pressure, anguish, or burden.

¹¹ Continuing instant in prayer – or, "In prayer stedfastly continuing" – "Continuing instant" = being earnest towards, persevering, being constantly diligent, to adhere closely to, to attend assiduously to [assiduously = steadily attentive]; "in prayer" = worship or diligent oration towards God. Note: Always pray for people; always have people’s best interests in mind; always be concerned enough, and love people enough, to share their concerns – cf. v. 16; and always be ready to offer your sympathy in any given situation. How utterly important prayer is in our relationships!!!!!

13 ¹² Distributing to the necessity of saints – or, "Imparting to the needs of the saints." – "Necessity" = employment, occasion, demand, requirement, or destitution. Your love to the saints should be a deep, unrestrained love that provides for their deepest needs.

¹³ Given to hospitality. = Equipped, capable, prone to and reputable to entertain strangers, esp. "of the household of faith" (Eph 4:28) – Equip yourself to love others – that’s why you’re HERE!!!!!

14 ¹⁴ Bless them which persecute you – "Bless" = to speak well of, to invoke a benediction upon, to prosper; to praise someone; "persecute" = to ensue or to press forward upon.

¹⁵ Bless, and curse not – "Curse" = to doom.

15 ¹⁶ Rejoice with them that do rejoice – "Rejoice" = to greet or be well with somebody.

¹⁷ And weep with them that weep – "Weep" = to sob or to wail – In other words, acknowledge people’s joys and hurts alike – don’t be afraid to sympathize with someone who genuinely hurts, or is genuinely happy.

16 ¹⁸ Be of the same mind one toward another – "Same" = Gk autos; "mind" = interest, sentiment, opinion, to interest oneself or be concerned with someone – Amos 3:3 asks this question: "Can two walk together, except they be agreed?" Note: Do you know what a "cry for help" sounds like?

¹⁹ Mind not high things – "High" = lofty things – ideals or concepts, attitudes or detachment.

²⁰ But condescend to men of low estate - "Condescend" = to take off together, to passively yield, to transport or carry away with; "of low estate" = depressed, humiliated, cast down, humble, of low degree, or lowly (cf. notes on v. 12)

²¹ Be not wise in your own conceits – "Conceits" = proximity, detachment, or uninvolvement; Webster = "having a high opinion of one’s self or ability" – in other words, holding off from others in a theoretical attitude, as an observer, just thinking you have the answers for them, when in fact, you don’t have the answers for them, because you really don’t actually understand them like you think you do.

17 ²² Recompense to no man evil for evil - "Recompense" = to give back (freely and readily); "evil" = injury or harm – "To no man" – note that this refers equally to friends, enemies, and all general acquaintances.

²³ Provide things honest in the sight of all men – "Provide" = to consider in advance, or to look out beforehand, by circumspection; "honest" = valuable or virtuous; not just some men, or certain men, or your favorite men, but ALL MEN!!!!! – cf. 2 Cor 4: 1-2, esp. v. 2: "Therefore seeing we have this ministry, as we have received mercy, we faint not; 2 But have renounced the hidden things of dishonesty, not walking in craftiness, nor handling the word of God deceitfully; but by manifestation of the truth commending ourselves to every man’s conscience in the sight of God. "

18 ²⁴ If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.

• "Possible" = "If you are capable, or if you are able."

• "As much as lieth in you" – "As much as you can do, with the responsibility and power you have."

• "Live peaceably" = "Be a peacemaker" – whatever you must personally sacrifice, be a peacemaker; and, in the face of the anger of others, … be a peacemaker.

• Despite the rage that may be welling up inside of you right now … BE A PEACEMAKER, with ALL MEN! - see note for v. 17.

19 Dearly beloved, ²⁵ avenge not yourselves.

²⁶ But rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord – or, "don’t take things into your own hands, but move out of the way of God’s reproofs in people’s lives" - "Give place" = make room; "Vengeance" = vindication, retribution, or punishment; it means to "requite," or to make repayment or return for something.

20 Therefore ²⁷ if thine enemy hunger, feed him.

²⁸ If he thirst, give him drink: for ["because"] in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head – "Two senses are given of this, which I think are both to be taken in disjunctively. Thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head; that is, “Thou shalt either,” 1. “Melt him into repentance and friendship, and mollify his spirit towards thee” (alluding to those who melt metals; they not only put fire under them, but heap fire upon them; thus Saul was melted and conquered with the kindness of David, 1Sa 24:16; 1Sa 26:21) – “thou wilt win a friend by it, and if thy kindness have not that effect then[;]” [or] 2. “It will aggravate his condemnation, and make his malice against thee the more inexcusable. Thou wilt hereby hasten upon him the tokens of God’s wrath and vengeance.” Not that this must be our intention in showing him kindness, but, for our encouragement, such will be the effect. " (Matthew Henry’s Commentary).

21 ²⁹ Be not overcome of evil, but

³⁰ But overcome evil with good.

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